there is a word….
but i cannot find it,
i cannot see it
i cannot write it
i cannot speak it
i cannot hear it
but jesus it haunts me….
today is like yesterday where the beginning starts
but no ending for the past and the future is so far more
distant than ever
than i could have ever realized
for my energy came from “my future thought”
and now paralyzed in a sea of foam, as if it were quicksand and commences to suffocate the magnificence of life itself
it blackens my soul ,
torments my heart
runs incessantly in my hot and corrupted veins
dampens my intellect,
cripples my judgment
blinds my sight
it takes at will my own deserved “manhood”
it tries to halt and not allow me the freedom to create
as i once did
it sheers my imagination, stops my laughter and smile
rips the mere fabric from my shadowed frame
brings me to the deepest of confusion
and yet i fight to stay alive with it….
AND YET AGAIN…for each time
“it takes my breath away”
af/copyright–07/19/2016–6:49pm